Thursday, June 2, 2016

Anatomy of a TEDx Talk



TEDx Ubud happened this year on May 28.  TED talks are inspirational and informative whether I watch them on YouTube or actually have the privilege to attend the talks.  I always feel fired up watching people so passionate about their subject. This year was no exception - only this year I was a speaker too,

I spoke about my fourteen years’ experience as a caregiver to my husband, Bob, who had Alzheimer’s Disease. It was an intimate look at life with Alzheimer’s and how it affects the caregiver. 

Giving this seventeen minute talk with no notes and no prompter was no easy task. It was an endeavor of love and strict discipline.  When I was first asked to speak my immediate response was, “Oh no, I could never get up in front of all those people!”  I asked if I could think about it. 

I sensed, in spite of my fear, this was a once in a life time opportunity.  I thought, I mulled and I tried to visualize myself on the TED stage but that vision had adrenaline coursing through my body along with feeling a rock was solidly forming in the pit of my stomach.  

I have been a risk taker all my life and I’ve vowed as I approach 70 years of age, not to stay quietly in my comfort zone or rely on rigid routines to run my day. I have vowed to push my boundaries and break down barriers. Last year I did it with a solo trip to Sicily. This year I did TEDx. 

With heart pounding and adrenaline rushing up my torso filling my arms and legs, the TEDx host invited me up to the stage with 350 pairs of eyes watching my every move. A wave of nervous emotion swept over me but I managed to push it down knowing how difficult it is to talk and weep at the same time.  

I had been preparing for this for months. As per the TED guidelines, I wrote the script of my talk, memorized it, and rehearsed it with the organizers. We tweaked it a little bit each time crafting a talk that would touch people. 

I practiced it in the gym when I was on the elliptical and the treadmill machines. I practiced it daily at home and when I really had it down, I invited friends to be my audience.  At one rehearsal someone’s phone rang and my mind blanked. It wasn’t that I couldn’t remember what to say but there was just nothing there but emptiness.  Maybe that’s why Zen teachers rap their students’ shoulders suddenly with a stick! 

From that day on my partner, Alan, became my distractor and what a funny distractor he was.  In the middle of my practice he’d call me or bang on the wall. Sometimes he’d cough loudly, hum, or clean the fish pond right in front of me. He also took to staring at me from only a few feet away. At first I’d laugh because he was so funny but soon I learned to focus no matter what the interruption. As it turned out this was all unnecessary because there was not a sound in the room except me talking. I had the audience’s attention. 

A funny thing happened early on in the talk. It was like I left my body and watched myself giving the talk. Then I realized this, so it was like I was watching myself watching myself giving the talk.  I didn’t have to do anything! 

When I got toward the end I got teary and croaked out the last lines as a photo of my husband and I hiking in the Himalaya’s appeared on the screen behind me. I couldn’t see it but I knew it was there. It was a beautiful tribute to Bob and to our life together. 

There wasn't a dry eye in the house - including mine.

This talk was a joint endeavor. Without the support of the TED team, my friends and family, I don’t think I could have done it. This was my boundary breaker for my 70th year. 

Now which barrier shall I spar with next?

The article that goes with the TEDx photo above:

A video of the talk will be on YouTube around the end of June 2016. I'll post the link then. 


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