The Heart Smile

My Painting Table

Sometimes I’m sitting in my painting studio (as opposed to my beading studio) and my heart starts smiling. No really, I can feel it in my chest - a sort of expansion that goes beyond ribs and muscle and skin.  This deep down connection with creativity is like anticipation that something joyful is about to happen. This also happens in the beading studio but I share that with my assistant and am rarely there alone. This ‘heart smile’ comes with solitude.

I see artist’s studios as sacred spaces.  Like Merlin we conjure up the unknown and bring it into this world in whatever medium we work, whether it’s painting, drawing, sculpture, music, dance, writing, or other creative pursuits.  Time disappears, we step away, and magic happens through us.  

I used to need my studio to be neat. In fact that need could overtake the desire to create. It became an excuse to not face my fear of blank white paper.  It was a buffer between my desire to get my vision out through my hands with paints or pencils or pastels onto the art paper and the actual doing of it, which was often scary.  What if I can’t do it? What if I’ve lost the ability? What if I create crap? Or worse - What if I waste time?

Now with less hours available to be in either studio - the business of  selling jewelry takes up more time than the doing - the neat nick has stepped back. That is until my work table is just too crowded to use and I have to call her back.

Better Call In the Neat Nick!

Today the ‘heart smile’ came as I opened the door to my home/office after a two hour session in the painting studio.  I just felt happy!  I’d started mixing new colors - colors I have rarely used and it was thrilling. 

If you’ve been reading this blog you know my new medium is carved bone - carvings I design and have carved by my team of inspired and expert Balinese carvers. I then apply color to them.  It took over a year of research but I’ve finally found the type of paints to use to get the feeling I envision.

Today I mixed violet and gamboge yellow in various proportions to get colors that tickled me - made me joyous.  That joy now enhances a sea horse and I can even see the beads that will go with him!  Ah the ‘heart smile’ again or is that a grin?